Secret Scotland

If it's secret, and in Scotland…

The brilliant Austin Brexit

Nothing to do with the politics, but this is a bit of a gem.

While the poor little Allegro gets a lot of stick now that it is history, I did know one person who had one when the type was current, and even got the occasional trip in it.

Over the few years we were neighbours, his supposedly unreliable and horrible little car never missed a beat.

It WAS quirky, so I can see how those who are sheep-brained conformists would have hated it.

Austin Brexit

Austin Brexit

(Seen on imgur, noted before it disappears.)


January 15, 2018 Posted by | Civilian, Transport | , , | Leave a comment

310 to Moodiesburn – an interesting bus

Passing a bus stop on Hamilton Road (outside the Dog’s Trust), I had to go back and take a closer look.

Not having been on a bus for many years, I still doubt this pic is an official company pic, intended to attract travellers, and any indication of the sort of fun that can be had on the ‘310 to Moodiesburn’.

More likely the result of having ‘great’ mates…

310 To Moodiesburn

310 To Moodiesburn

January 12, 2018 Posted by | Civilian, photography, Transport | , | Leave a comment

Just too late for Christmas

While I was lucky enough to come across ‘My First Fire’ in time for Christmas, and hopefully managed to light up a few tiny mite’s eyes over the Festive season, I was too late with this find.

Maybe there’s a handy birthday just around the corner, or it will just have to go on the next Christmas list.

Gotta get ’em hooked YOUNG.

Start that training EARLY.

My First Vape

My First Vape

January 7, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , | Leave a comment

Knock knock knock knock…

For pity’s sake, open the damned door hoomin!



So good, it’s worth repeating.

Snow’s just SO popular.

Not claiming it’s mine in any way – Source

Got this later…

Next time the door was left open…

Next Time

Next Time

January 4, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

Puking Kitty Sauce/Gravy Boat really is real

First there was…

Puking Kitty Sauce/Gravy Boat is real

Then there was…

Puking Kitty Sauce Boat Reality

Puking Kitty Sauce Boat Reality

Oh the irony of a real live ‘sauce boat’ 🙂

It’s even the right colour (I could be referring to the cat, or I could be… ).

It gets better, but this seems to be a huge gif that take ages to load (or hangs) and can’t be resized to suit this blog’s width.

So, click the image to view it directly in all its glory.

Real Kitty Sauce Boat Gif Link

Real Kitty Sauce Boat SloMo Gif Link

December 31, 2017 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

Just too late – I found the ideal Christmas gift

Found too late to order some in for this year, I’ll have to lay in a supply of these handy ducks for Christmas 2018.

Ideal for that special ‘somebody’.

Interesting to note the provision of a standard UK 13 A fused mains plug, and 2-core cable, so no nasty earth lead to interfere with its use.

If not already modified (no mention on the label), then the standard fuse (which will have to have been fitted to comply with regulations) should probably be replaced by a wire link, just to make sure it doesn’t stop working.

Like all such non-compliant options, the manufacturer could avoid problems with the regulators simply by providing such a link in the bag, with a note for the buyer to change it prior to use.

I think they should provide a US plug in the bag too, so that people could box the duck up, and send it (along with some nice bath soap) to the orange moron.

Electric Duck

Electric Duck


Well THERE’S a coincidence.

Shortly after I suggested the electric duck’s plug should be modified, somebody provided a handy instructional pic!

UK Plug Mod

UK Plug Mod

December 28, 2017 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

Creepy elves spy on kids for Santa – or training for the surveillance era

Rummaging through some pre-Christmas sale items on Christmas Eve, I was amazed to see this offering:

Elf Surveillance Camera

Elf Surveillance Camera

Given the sort of hysteria some people manage to raise over perfectly innocent activities, I’m somewhat amazed to see this item actually made it onto the shelves without protest.

Who can forget the outcry and bans that were publicised when camcorders became common, and places such as schools banned parents from bringing them to school plays, to record their own children’s performance.

And let’s not forget the dire warnings from various ‘experts’ who love to pop up every now and then, alerting parents to the danger of hackers turning on cameras and microphones in laptops, home computers, tablets, mobile phones etc, without triggering the lights or indicators that show they are active.

And just a few days ago there were yet more expert warnings, for parents to check toys that can receive messages from mobile phones, and relay them to children. Apparently these are easy for naughty people to hack, and send unsavoury messages to the children, and even change the voices from nice friendly ‘toy’ voices, into scary monster voices.

At least this creepy little elf’s camera has a flashing LED.

Wouldn’t it be shocking to find out the ‘Dummy Child Surveillance Camera’ was a massive con set up by a worldwide ‘ring’, and far from being a dummy, was in fact packed with high-def camera, complete with its own wireless connection and RPi or similar which is programmed to silently hack into the nearest mobile phone or wireless access point, and relay pics of kids’ bedrooms around the world.

Maybe there’s a reason those batteries, supposedly only powering a flashing LED, have to be replaced on an almost daily basis.

That would never happen, would it?


You can get the same standard black dummy surveillance cam in Pound Shops for… er… ÂŁ1.

A splash of white paint, and a bit of tinsel or some glitter would make it a bargain Christmas cam.

Better value than this ÂŁ5 rip-off (slashed to clear at ÂŁ3.99!).

And I much prefer my own surveillance special – nobody will EVER notice this…

Black Cat Christmas Tree

Black Cat Christmas Tree


December 25, 2017 Posted by | Civilian, Surveillance | , , , , | Leave a comment

What every Glesga wean wants for Christmas – My First Fire

*(For the benefit of visitors: Glesga, or Glesca, weans – small children from Glasgow).

You could have made yourself a fortune a few years ago, had you been the importer/distributor for:

My First Fire

My First Fire

Not that it was really needed, as there were so many derelict building lying abandoned around the city, fires were a regular event.

And they didn’t have to be derelict – with many nudges and winks regarding insurance when occupied buildings burnt down ‘mysteriously’.

Others were reputed to be blocking sites ripe for development, but were listed building, so could not be modified, altered, or developed, even if decaying, neglected, and ruinous.

A little fire, a quick inspection, a declaration of danger to the public – and demolition followed swiftly, almost as swiftly as the new build on the cleared ground… some said.

December 25, 2017 Posted by | Civilian, council, Lost | , , | Leave a comment

Genetic engineering at its best

Some people thing genetic engineering is a bad thing.

They could be wrong.


Baby Catbird

Baby Catbird

On the other hand…

They grow up so quick.

Maybe no so much want…

Adult Catbird

Adult Catbird

See more here:

Cat Birbs

December 15, 2017 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , | Leave a comment

Wonder if Bill’s Tool Store has these ingenious new adjustable wrenches

The Interwebs – a wonderful place to find gadgets. And Christmas presents.

Take this cleverly designed shifter (adjustable wrench), able to fit both metric and imperial nuts.

No need to carry around one shifter for each type. Save weight and space with this clever double-ended design, able to fit both with the same tool.

MetrImp Shifter

MetrImp Shifter

I’ll have to try to remember to drop into Bill’s Tool Store next time I’m passing through The Barras, and ask if they have these in stock.

This is a (very) recent pic, and was something of a surprise when I took it.

I NEVER noticed the cartoon above the shop when just walking along Bain Street.

Thankfully, this isn’t just because I’m thick, but because I never normally pass the shop on the opposite side of the road – I’m always on the shop side so I can check out the windows.

I’ll maybe pop them in a post of their own later. They’re too small in this one.

Bills Tool Store Front

Bills Tool Store Front

The tool show carries on around the corner.

This used to be a good place to find cheap surplus or clearance, esp ex-MoD items, but this source has largely dried up, and the shop (to its credit) tends to avoid what might be called ‘cheap rubbish’, so prices have crept up over the years. That’s not really the shop’s fault, and having tried some ‘cheap rubbish’ from others, they’re probably wise not to go down that route.

You can still find some odd goodies there, if you just keep a regular watch on the windows.

Bills Tool Store Corner

Bills Tool Store Corner

Although the shifter is an online spoof (you did know that, didn’t you?), there are spanners (and sockets) that fit both metric and imperial nuts and bolts.

Known as Metrinch (a trade name, hence the reason I didn’t use it above for the shifter), they are surface drive spanners (and sockets).

Rather than being sized so the distance across the flats corresponds to the distance across the flats of a nut or bolt, they have a form of curved drive surface, convex, and able to fit any fitting that the curved surface can lock onto, like a cam.

This makes them good for poorly sized fittings, and those that have been damaged or rounded.

18mm Metrinch

18mm Metrinch


I thought this pic was… illustrative. It’s not mine – I wouldn’t exert the amount of force needed to do that damage, even on a rubbish bit.

Chinesium Drill Bits

Chinesium Drill Bits

I recently NEEDED a small drill bit urgently, but had none left.

I ran round to a big general shed that opened a couple of years ago, and had a DIY aisle. Since I was only drilling a tiny hole in plastic I just grabbed a small set of anonymous bits for a couple of quid.


Half of them were unsharpened, while others were so poorly formed the tips were ROUNDED.

Few would even drill a hole.

Fortunately, they were too cheap even to be worth the effort of returning and complaining – but I pity anyone who does not understand drill bits who might buy the same rubbish, and then wonder why they can’t drill a hole.

It reminded of a mistake I made a few years back, when I spent ÂŁ40 on a set of supposedly “Last drill bits you’ll need to buy” from Ideal World.

You may have seen them, they’re still repeating the offer every so often, despite a shedload of NEGATIVE reviews from unhappy buyers as reported on their own web site.

Supposedly indestructible, and tipped by an insert that will drill through ANYTHING (they love showing it going through files and brake disks, then glass and ceramics), the first time I used them…

The insert BROKE out of the drill shaft, or the shafts snapped, on all the small bits.

The replacement guarantee is rubbish too.

While they offer to replace any broken bit for free – you have to pay the post and packing, and that’s ÂŁ4 or ÂŁ5 PER BIT!!

December 13, 2017 Posted by | photography | , , , , | 2 Comments

Problem neighbour keeps leaving his jaguar in my drive

My neighbour may not be short of a bob or two, but he’s not very bright.

A fast-talking salesman sold him a cheap jaguar, and he refuses to believe anyone who tells him he was conned. Even the bites and scratches have failed to convince him.

He can’t remember which driveway is his either, and keeps leaving his ‘jaguar’ in mine. Like all cats, it likes to sit on the warm bonnet, and just looks at me as if I was stupid when I ask it to move.

I used to be able to get its attention by sending small children to ‘pet the nice pussycat’ – but I can’t find any now.

Leopard Rolls

Leopard Rolls

November 30, 2017 Posted by | Transport | , , | Leave a comment

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