Secret Scotland

If it's secret, and in Scotland…

Naptime! I’ll buy that, I’ll even take out a subscription!

After it apparently became ‘acceptable’ for kids to be taken into pubs and restaurants, and not ‘PC’ to object as parents were taken aback by the slightest suggestion that they control them, tone down their offspring’s volume, or not use other patron’s tables and chairs as playground equipment, I used to regret trying to take clients out for business lunches.

Eventually, we just stayed in the work, and came to deal with a nearby ‘greasy spoon’ whereby they’d send in sandwiches.

(That part’s actually true. Not only did the uncontrolled kids make it impossible to hold a discussion, they caused so many other problems the level of service became atrocious as the serving staff tried to cope. It eventually just took too long to have those lunches.)

If only Naptime had been available back then 🙂



Jan 19, 2019 Posted by | Civilian | , | Leave a comment

Almost perfect supermarket aisle

I have to complain about this supermarket and its male/female discrimination.

The aisles MUST be reorganised to bring the whisky shelves closer!

Crazy cat person supermarket

Crazy cat person supermarket

After all…

Crazy Cat Man has to shop too!

Crazy Cat Man

Crazy Cat Man

Jan 18, 2019 Posted by | Civilian | , | Leave a comment

Anybody else miss those old ‘educational’ cigarette adverts?

It’s an art form I’ve mentioned before, cigarette adverts based on medical facts from the industry.

I spotted one I hadn’t seen before, promoting the benefits of smoking cigarettes for mother AND baby.

Quality material.

Nice 🙂

Smoking Birth Weight

Winston is probably one of my most hated brands.

Not because of smoking or tobacco, but because of truly irritating little song they had a woman with loud and grating voice sing back in the good old days of radio, where she just keeps singing that catch catchphrase at the foot of the ad ‘Winston tastes good! Like a cigarette should!” over and over, like brainwashing.

Unfortunately, while many OTR (old time radio) show providers have cut many of the irritating adverts of the day from their programmes, this song is one that often seem to survive, and blasts out repeatedly during breaks in the programmes.

Jan 13, 2019 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

Looks like Edinburghers don’t share Glaswegians sense of humour (just kidding)

I don’t know if this article is serious or not, I really just can’t gauge the tone.

However, I am sure I’m sad that the recent two-part Billy Connolly documentary was used to fuel it…

Then, my mate brought up the Connolly documentary, more specifically the bit in part one where Sharleen Spiteri takes a random pop at Edinburgh, even attempting a posh accent and my mood started to resemble Tony Montana’s in the final scene of Scarface.

The Texas singer said and I quote – “Glasgow was the arse end of Scotland because Edinburgh always got (attempts Miss Jean Brodie accent) ‘oh it’s lovely in Edinburgh – we’ve got a castle and it’s all fabulous’.” Really Sharleen?

The gist of what she was saying plays on the tired old notion of Edinburgh punters being “stuck up” and Glaswegians being a friendlier bunch.

I’ve listened to that type of inverted snobbery my whole life and feel it’s time to consign this dreary inter-city rivalry to the dustbin of history where it belongs.

It’s bordering on sectarianism and works both ways with Edinburgh people giving it “Weegie this and Weegie that” – there’s no way the Capital gets off the hook here.

Kevan Christie: Red Clydesiders would despair over Edinburgh-Glasgow rivalry

While there are a sad few who will always be genuine bigots and/or xenophobes, and will never change, most of us are normal, have a sense of humour, and a cheeky wink or twinkle in our eye as we say some terrible things.

The real problem is probably the ‘PC Brigade’ who won’t even allow this sort of comment to pass as innocent, and believe anyone who makes such comments deserves to be censured, and treated as if they were racist bigots.

It’s another example of what I see as people NOT actually being allowed to think freely, instead, being TOLD what to think by a noisy few who have some sort of agenda they want to further.

Maybe the writer should try this book…

I guess I’ll be criticised for this chose, since I’m a Weegie, and Weegies appear FIRST in the title, so it MUST be biased!


Weegies vs Edinbuggers

Weegies vs Edinbuggers


There’s a slogan that Glaswegians use when talking about Edinburgh’s world-famous joie de vivre: ‘Edinburgh! A castle, a smile and a song…One out of three isn’t bad.’ Edinburghers retaliate by talking of why all the Wise Men come from the East and all the cowboys from the West. So we have the Far East, the Wild West and an apparently unbridgeable gulf in between, usually called Falkirk. These are the jokes, the songs and the stories of why citizens of these two great cities would rather take Osama bin Laden home for tea than a Weegie or an Edinbugger, citizens of no mean cities though they be. Except, of course, traditionally, there is no request to tea in Edinburgh, more of a statement delivered without a question mark, as in ‘You’ll have had your tea.’ And ‘pal’ is the unfriendliest word there is in Glasgow. When a Glaswegian asks, ‘Ur you lookin’ at me, pal?’, you would be very naive indeed to think of it as a question or that the deliverer is intent on making friends. It is, in fact, a statement meaning something like, ‘Unless you come up with a smart reply sharpish, I’m going to attempt to remove your head from your shoulders with any weapon that comes to hand. Or my teeth.’ There’s nothing rational about it. Weegies know that all Edinburghers are just poncing about all day pretending to be flowers and waiting for dark to get up Calton Hill because, without exception, they like their vice versa. And Edinbuggers know that, in Weegie families, father, mother and sister often don’t add up to three, but that they do keep their chibs sharp, whatever a chib might be. There are hard hits from both sides, sharp jibes and bludgeoning diatribes, but it’s just friendly rivalry really. To use the double positive negative, a figure of speech unique to Scotland, ‘Aye, right.’

Jan 12, 2019 Posted by | Civilian | , , , | Leave a comment

Cat telepathy in Dalmarnock

This pair looked quite funny when they spotted one another on a glum, wet day.


Dalmarnock Cat 1

Dalmarnock Cat 1

“I wish I had gone out.”

Dalmarnock Cat Window

Dalmarnock Cat Window


Dalmarnock Cat 2

Dalmarnock Cat 2

Dec 28, 2018 Posted by | photography | , , | Leave a comment

When Christmas lights go rogue

After the recent silly story the media decided to make some mileage out of, I couldn’t really leave this little gem out.

Especially after noting I had withdrawn from this game after the cheap Chinese microcontroller based stuff started to make my hand-crafted offerings look sad and ‘simple’.

While I know a lot of cheapest and nastiest stuff which can’t pass UK/EU safety rules, having looked at quite a lot of the design of the LED controllers and some pretty ingenious wiring/control systems they use, there’s a lot of clever ideas in those systems.

Some of them can take a lot of thought to ‘reverse engineer’ to see just how they work.

I’m not sure what impresses me more – what can be done with microcontrollers that have as few as 16 pins (or even 8, or less), or how anyone manages to plough the manual for such things, which can run to dozens, or even hundreds of pages to describe all the goodies hidden inside, and to access/control them.

I saw one reviewer comment on one that was selling for the equivalent of 3 p!


Dec 25, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

Found a ‘Trump Wall’ people would happily pay for

Best Trump Wall ever!

Best Trump Wall

The comments after this were great.

Two were notable.

One that suggested it needed a lid.

Then a later one suggested the best lid would be a Toilet Seat!


Dec 24, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , , | Leave a comment

After the cat met the Christmas tree (Updated)

So, the Christmas tree went to assertiveness classes.

Christmas Tree Warning

Christmas Tree Warning


Really Grumpy Cat

Really Grumpy Cat




Christmas Tree Challenge Accepted

Christmas Tree Challenge Accepted

Dec 20, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , , , | Leave a comment

Please Miss, ah’m cauld – GET ON WITH YOUR WORK!

Not sure what almost had me on the floor with laughter first.

The idea that it is cold enough at the moment for this to be any sort of issue.

Or that anyone would DARE force children to do anything in school nowadays.

In my day, I don’t think anyone would have even noticed this, and just shoved on an extra jumper and jacket (if they could afford them).

Shivering schoolkids forced to work in freezing class

Just imagine if we still had the children’s TB hospitals or sanatoriums of old, where there was no heating, and the doors and windows of the wards were thrown open all day, year round. This image just happens to be lingering in my mind at the moment, after I came across some B&W archive footage of a typical patient’s stay in such a place about 50 years ago.

The delicate little darlings we breed today would probably die in their first week of treatment! Or have to be treated for their ‘allergies’.

Why, I remember school days back in the Old Country, where the kids positively revelled in the chance to get out in the fresh air.

School Bath Day

School Bath Day

Dec 18, 2018 Posted by | Civilian, council | , , , , | Leave a comment

McDonald’s – I’m loving it

As appetising as their ‘food’.

McDonalds Straws

McDonald’s Straws

Dec 18, 2018 Posted by | Civilian | , , , | Leave a comment

SALE! – 30% Off Back Pain

Couldn’t resist snapping this just after I walked past it – and had to go back for a second look 🙂

30% Off Back Pain

30% Off Back Pain

Dec 9, 2018 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , | Leave a comment

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